


Long way to nowhere

by Xaelinardth



Category: Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, M/M, Misogyny, Post-Break Up, Post-Shard of Ice (The Witcher) (probably), References to Depression, friends but at what cost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25508362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xaelinardth/pseuds/Xaelinardth
Summary: After one of his numerous break-ups with Yennefer Geralt goes to meet Jaskier and they have a rather pointless conversation about relationships and life in general.More serious problems are yet to come.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion/Valdo Marx, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg (mentioned), past Essi Daven/Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
Comments: 3
Kudos: 7





	Long way to nowhere

It all started when he came back in the evening and a letter from Yennefer was waiting for him on the table. He didn't even have to read it to know its content. But he did. Otherwise someone might accuse him of jumping to conclusions. So he did not jump to conclusions. He left Aedd and went to Novigrad. For some time he wandered around the city alone. Then he got drunk. Then he went to brothel. And then he left again.  
Some time earlier, he had received a letter from Jaskier, who was spending winter at the Cidaris court. The letter was rather laconic and gloomy in tone, at least for Jaskier, and it was informing that the author was going to Oxenfurt in a month to give a guest lecture so they could meet there, as long as Geralt had nothing better to do. 

The witcher was too preoccupied with the progressive downfall of his relationship, so he forgot about the letter. He remembered it now. Although the theory of literature and new trends in poetry didn’t interest him in the least, no one said that participation in the lecture was compulsory. And they could actually meet, for sure, because he really had nothing better to do and for the moment he was not planning to change this fact.  
He arrived in Oxenfurt two days before the scheduled presentation, and met Jaskier the next day. The poet did not look very well. He was pale, disheveled, shaky and showed symptoms of melancholy and mild alcohol poisoning, but it was hard to tell which was cause and which effect. They went straight to the first inn they found. Geralt ordered a beer, Jaskier, which came as quite a surprise, ordered some herbal infusion. 

'Are you sick?,' he asked just for the record.  
'One could say that.'  
'What's up in Cidaris?'  
'Just the usual. Intrigues, affairs, scandals, conspiracies, this season somehow ended without a coup. It's a pity, maybe it wouldn't be so boring if it did. And I met Essi Daven. She sends you greetings.'  
'Thank you', muttered the witcher. 'Give her my best next time.'  
'I’ll certainly do. Though it might be better if you did it by yourself. You don’t want? Too bad. At least I tried.'  
'I know, you always try. Have you met Valdo Marx?'  
'And how do you know?' Jaskier asked suspiciously.  
'I guessed from the pathetic tone of your letter. What happened next?'  
'What was supposed to happen? Nothing.'  
'Bullshit.'  
'Well… Jaskier cleared his throat,' I was hoping that the bastard has changed a little through all these years. But obviously I was being delusional. If he has changed, it’s only for the worse. It was a mistake that I agreed to talk to him in the first place.'  
‘Maybe if you had just talked, it wouldn't have been so bad.’  
‘Probably. It was nice for maybe a week, anyway. Then, as always, his obsessions and paranoia started to manifest. I had the impression that he would gladly put me on a leash, lock me in the basement, not let me see anyone or let anyone see me.’  
'I kind of understand his motives, given your views on monogamy,' muttered the witcher, smirking.  
‘Very funny. Besides, my opinion is well-founded, but it’s not a point here. The guy is really seriously deranged. Oh, Geralt! Why did I not manage to kill him back then?’  
‘Because you didn't have the seal. Or experience in dealing with genies. But it probably turned out well, if you ask me. At least your conscience is clear.’  
‘I can assure you that murdering him wouldn’t be any reason to have a guilty conscience, growled Jaskier. ‘I just don't know why I didn't stab him now, when I just had the perfect opportunity for this.'

Geralt made no comment. It was hard for him to imagine Jaskier stabbing anyone. The most dangerous tool he could see in his hand was a corkscrew.

‘But you know what he came up with? You won’t believe!’  
‘Shoot.’  
‘Imagine, he said, no more and no less, that I should give up my professional career and live with him as, listen to this, his assistant. It was probably just a pretext to take credit for my work. I haven't heard anything so brazen in a long time. I didn’t know whether to laugh, to cry or to kick his ass.’  
'I understand that you did not accept the offer.'  
‘You understand well. I refused in a few carefully chosen words, then I walked away with dignity, first shaking the dust off my feet. Fortunately, he hasn't thought of locking me up in the basement yet’  
'I can picture that', said Geralt seriously. ‘And to think I once believed in your stories about your professional rivalry.’  
'Professional rivalry played a significant role here, I must admit. The motherfucker would never come to terms with the fact that I'm more talented than him. And apparently he still didn't accept that.'  
'Of course. How could it be different.'  
'Heed my advice, do not mix private and business matters. Luckily it’s probably unlikely in your case, unless you change profession,’ he giggled.  
'Yes, probably', Geralt replied gloomily.  
‘Well, unless… Admit it, do you like anyone in Kaer Morhen? Okay, okay, I was kidding, don’t make faces. You look like you had been bitten by rabid dogs.’  
‘You on the other hand are just shining.’  
‘It’s due to stress.’  
'Vodka, fisstech, several other unidentified substances and thoughtless debauchery also contributed, as I suppose.'  
'Yes. These were due to stress too. I had to unwind a bit.'  
‘I see. Hopefully you didn’t contract any disease. Have you been here for long?’  
‘About two weeks. As a matter of fact, I’m exhausted. One more week like this and I’d consider becoming a druid. Unless I die sooner.'  
'And I thought you would have a drink with me.'  
'Sorry, but probably not today. I need to resemble a human being tomorrow at least remotely. We can drink after my lecture. Or better the day after tomorrow, tomorrow there will probably be an afterparty. Maybe some poetry evening, plague upon it. Of course, you can drop by if you think this would entertain you.'  
‘And what am I supposed to do in there? Recite my poetry?’  
'For instance. You would certainly be recognized as an outstanding representative of the avant-garde. Especially if I announce you as such. You wouldn't even have to recite anything. It is enough for you to stand in the corner and look at everyone with superiority.'  
‘Maybe another time. Somehow I'm not in the mood.’  
'I see, will you at least come to my lecture?'  
‘I highly doubt it. I wouldn't understand anything anyway.’  
'You are being far too modest. So will three-quarters of the audience. I have to find other source of entertainment for you, then. If I can make a suggestion about the tourist attractions of Oxenfurt, there is probably the best brothel on the whole continent.'  
'You always say that about every other one. And about every other employee of such.'  
'But this time it's not a hyperbole. You will see for yourself. I can bet that they have everything you can imagine. Especially since imagination is not your strongest point.'  
‘Oh, really.’  
‘Hm', Jaskier looked aside and pretended to wonder. ‘But here I am, promoting debauchery, and I completely forgot to ask how things are with Yennefer.’  
‘Fucked up’, replied Geralt, as befitted an outstanding representative of the avant-garde.  
‘Yeah, well then. In that case, I don't think I know what else I could ask.'  
'Better don’t ask anything at all'  
'So I won’t. But it's kind of interesting, I was just about to tell you that I’m going to abstain from any contacts with representatives of my own sex until further notice.'  
'I don’t see any connection. But may I know for what reason?'  
'Here’s the connection: I came to the conclusion that contacts with opposite sex are much less complicated and frustrating in the long run. Obviously apart from special cases like yours.'  
‘Don’t forget to pass my sincere condolences to all the representatives of the opposite sex you meet on the way. And besides, it’s just plain nonsense. Well, unless someone treats women the way you do.’  
'And how do I treat women, I assume, unlike you, my errant knight of Rivia?'  
'Purely instrumental,' said the witcher firmly.  
'Tell me about it. I’m eager to know if you figured it out by yourself, or if it’s Yennefer's teaching.’  
‘Be so kind and fuck off.’  
‘You, on the contrary, Jaskier carried on unabashedly, ‘in your dealings with women, are only looking for harmony, spiritual understanding and intellectual stimulation. Or maybe I missed something?'  
'This sarcasm and hollow words won’t make you seem more intelligent. But I have to admit you can be right to some extent. Perhaps instrumental treatment works better in the long run.'  
'What a philosophical depth, Geralt. I need to talk to the dean, maybe you would be offered to give a lecture too. Or better you should start to write a treatise on this matter right away.'  
'Eh, to hell with you.'  
Jaskier smiled and stood up from his seat with a wince.  
'You're right, It’s time for me to go. I hardly slept this week. This is probably my last chance.'  
'This was evident from the level of your witticism. It remains for me to wish you to regain your mental prowess by tomorrow.'  
'Thank you dearly. Take care, Geralt.'  
'You too, idiot. See you soon.'

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from Black Sabbath 'Lonely is the word'
> 
> I translated it from what I previously wrote in Polish so please be understanding
> 
> I probably messed up the chronology, A Little Sacrifice is probably after Shard of Ice, but I think it doesn't change much


End file.
